A Brief Digression: Actors Who Can't Talk

In honor of your recent viewing of Penguins of Madagascar, 

here is a very famous actor being unable to pronounce the basic word, "penguin."

English Actor Fails to Speak English

Dispatches from a Desert Isle: Other Desert Birds

A Fillion Hummingbirds, 

the Quail, and 

One Slightly-Annoyed Kestrel

The kestrel may be North America's smallest falcon, and a mighty one at that, 

but that doesn't make it any less peevish.

If I don't look, maybe they'll go away.

What are you lookin' at?!?

           

Of course, it might just be the fact of being in a cage (birds really should not be in cages), 

but I have to think that just being a falcon makes one a little peevish. 

Or maybe he just wasn't getting to eat what he wanted:

        Much like one young boy we know, baby kestrels don't care how big their food is. 
Unlike humans, though, their mouths are specifically designed so 

they can breathe even when they stuff their faces! 

More cheerful, or at least their fights sound more charming, are the tiny hummingbirds. 

It's hard to get good pictures of them though.

blurry

less blurry but badly framed

Okay, no choice but to try to see them in action...

I can hear them, but maybe not see them.

Wait, one actually almost held still for a moment here!

Oh I give up!

What I was really hoping to see were quail—I love quail! 

Alas, no luck for me, but the interwebs can oblige us...

They are so danged cute!! 

Er... I mean... Majestic! That's it—majestic!

(hee hee hee, quail-head!)

One fine-looking Qouple.

They all remind me of my high school boyfriend Marcus, whom we called Old Quail-Head because he had one little bang just like a quail head-feather. I'll have to find a way to scan a picture so you can see what I mean, but for now, this guy below will have to do.

Qontemplative Quail misses Old Quail-Head

Here's what they say:

(Thank you Wildertography!)

And here are some babies. Their mama is less than a foot long, so they must be 2" tops. Hee hee hee!

Here's where they live

Here's one on his or her mama's back!

(That looks like another child I know)

An independent fellow...

"I have a feather... coming!"

and one little honey showing off its head-tuft. 

Let's call him Peter Quince.









Awwwwww.... quailies! hummies! kestries! No, that last one doesn't work. Kestrels will eat these other guys if they can. Hmmmm.... maybe that cage isn't so bad after all!

A Long Digression: A Very Serious Post about Poop

Here it is, the post you've all been waiting for, a veritable

Poop-A-Go-Go

(For my young audience out there, never let it be said I did not pander to your interests.)

Hello my little Poopsies!

Let's start with a couple little bedtime stories that you already know:

Everybody Poops

by Taro Gomi

(translated by Amanda Mayer Stinchecum)

and our old favorite: 

The Story of the Little Mole

who knew it was none of his business

by Werner Holzwarth

illustrated by Wolf Erlbruch

It's nice to have someone read to us once in awhile, isn't it?

Next, why don't you get to know your scat with this handy chart:

and these faux-caca models:

But what are drawings and models compared to the real poop?
See how much you can tell about what these animals ate by the look of their poops.

Black bear poop.

(Poached salmon? 

I love poached salmon.)

More bear poop. 
This one obviously ate something totally different. A pumpkin?

Oh dear.

This one was listed as "Bigfoot Poop," but I'm pretty sure it's bear dung too. Don't want to guess what it ate.

Sheesh, bear!

Excuuuuuuuuuuuuse you!

Elephants' poop is really, really big.

Way bigger than bears' dung.

I can totally stack my poop. Can you?

You probably remember 

wombat poop is cubical,

which makes it weirdly interesting.

and of course there's the infamous owl pellet, full of bones:

Most people think—don't touch poop.

But not everyone feels that way. 

Like the lowly dung beetle.

True Fact.


Then there are these 
cuddly things.
(Oh, cuties!)

The disgusting fact is that chinchillas
(and rabbits)
eat their own poop.

Ew.












Turns out there's a reason
(not that it makes it any less gross)



As if that's not bad enough, some folks eat other folks' poop, and only they know why...

...and they're not telling.

Musical interlude:
Poop! Dung dung dung... what is it GOOD FOR? 
(Absolutely everything!)

You probably know lots of people use poop for fertilizer... 

but you may not know how else they use it.

Some people burn poop 
(usually cow "patties") for fuel...

...some make houses of poop...










...or just pose by it.

I dunno. I guess that could just be mud.

Others make art from it...


(Hey, Poopy Monkey!)
























...or art that looks like it.

Wow. That artwork really, really stinks.

There's also poop fashion...















and cuddly stuffed poop toys

But that's not all...

Civets eat coffee berries and poop them out, and then people make coffee out of it!

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?

Yeah, I'm totally gonna go brew this up.

That poop-coffee is extra-expensive too!

Some poop is really valuable though...

This is whale poop, 

also known as Ambergris...

(people used to pretend it was whale vomit instead—not much better)

It's used to make perfume!

This is dried whale poop—apparently it's "waxy"...

I'll just take their word for that.

and this is the 8-year-old 
who found some dried whale poop 
and what happened to him...















So the next time you find something really nasty on the beach, please bring it home.
I'm serious.

You won't be surprised to find out some people get really excited about petrified and/or fossilized poop...

...but sometimes poop turns out not to be poop after all.

Ceci n'est pas un caca.

I guess that person was the butt of someone's joke. Ha ha ha!

Well, I've about reached the end of my poop knowledge now. 
Some may say this post really stinks, but I don't give a fart for their opinion—only yours—so let me know what you think.

Bonus educational experience:

(Apprendrez-vous les mots pour le caca, s.v.p., et déclarez de nouveau à moi):

and last but not least...
the real life version of Le Petit Taupe.

Bad Kitty!

Dispatches from a Desert Isle: Saguaro-rama!!

Among all the mysteries of this island, there is one constant—

CACTI

All around the pirate compound they can be found:
Tall cacti, small cacti,

cacti posing with animals that look like it,

cacti that look like cushions,


cacti that ARE cushions,



and chairs,



and sofas...

(Okay, that last one isn't real)

But everywhere you look, there are cacti.

as far as the eye can see,

there are millions, and billions, 

and trillions of cacti...

(also some very pretty mountains)

and as close as you're willing to look

Close...

...closer...

...Ouch!

Most of these prickly plants are Saguaro cacti, considered by the local Tohono O'odham to be a sort of People of the Desert, or at least respected members of their tribe. They believed the saguaros walked around at night.

The legend says that the first saguaro began life as a human baby who was abandoned by its mother, who never nursed her child. The infant, after following her in vain, finally sank into the earth and came up on a mountain slope as a giant cactus. >sob<

(The first Saguaro probably didn't look like this.)

Saguaros are thought to live for 200 or more years!!! 

They can grow to over 40 ft high 

They don't even grow their first arm until they are older than a whole human life! 

Wow.

You go, Saguaro.

Please note: if you were a Saguaro, you would be less than 1" tall right now.

Here are two I saw with arms that made me smile:

The droopy arm was caused by the weather getting too cold for the cactus at some point. 

By the way, check out that baby in the foreground. Probably a mere 50 years old.

Saguaros don't bloom until they are almost 70 years old.

That's almost as old as your grandparents.

When they do bloom, the flowers last only

one day and night, giving both day and nighttime creatures a chance to pollinate them.

 

Saguaros also give fruit.

How many animals do you think eat the fruit? (Answer in a link below.)

Saguaros support lots of desert life—

run your mouse over things on these pages to learn more about 

the plants and animals that rely on them:

Saguaros in the Daytime

Saguaros in the Nighttime

But Mommy, what happens when Saguaros die?

Are they called ghost cacti? No...

...but what's left is called a cactus skeleton. Saguaro skeletons look like this:

 Get a load of its face closer up!

SPOOOOOOOKY!!!

(Actually that "face" is called a "boot"—it's the spot that used to house an animal.)

Sometimes....

an animal that doesn't live in a cactus will find itself there anyway, 

because it is being chased by something bigger:

Holy prickly butt, Cat Woman!!! Glad they got down safely.

So, to sum up...

A cactus is not an animal, 

but animals use it.

A cactus is not a food

but you can eat some parts of it.

A cactus is not a huggable friend, 

 but you can love it from a distance.

A desert cactus should not be carried away from its desert home

except in your pictures....

...and the plural of cactus is cacti,

but you get to choose whether you want to focus on the singular or plural.

I love you, my little KCacti!